Discuss.

Drum roll please!!

OK, everyone has had long enough to share their input, so I must now announce the winners of my Art Contest. They turned out the way that I, myself, was leaning, so at least we are all in agreement about who can draw and who can almost draw. I'm a little sad that my muse and secret lover (Jamwall) only got honorable mention with one vote (his own); I had to vote my conscience (Tits). I hope that Jamwall will still treat me like an object and paddle my behind with blunt objects despite my betrayal.

Now then:

FIRST PLACE: Tits McGee

SECOND PLACE: Butchie



HONORABLE MENTION: Jamwall and Pope Terry

The first and second prize winners will receive crap from my house that has been incubated inside my shirt and/or pants for at least 3 hours, as soon as I have their mailing addresses and I find the appropriate crap to send, something that exemplifies the scope and beauty of this contest.

Everyone gets a certificate! Please print your certificate and display it proudly. See below.

Thank you to all who partcipiated. This contest has changed my view of you irreversibly and irrevocably. And all the other ir- words.

CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[REVISED]: 1 Day to Change Your Life!!!

The deadline is fast approaching!

Several four of you have submitted fabulous entries for my art contest. The rest of you: Please get your entries in by midnight on January 31!

Remember that you may represent the subjects in any way you can imagine, including hand signals, finger-paint, and cupcakes.

Bonus points for random use of the word "suckle" on a really old post somewhere in my blog! (no prize, just bonus points, and bragging rights)

Good luck!

[NOW UPDATED!] Are you ready for art school?: A Spinning Girl Contest

Are you a Michelangelo trapped inside the body of a regular guy or gal? By golly, I think you are! And it's time for you to tap into that hidden talent! If you're not convinced, watch this stimulating, fast-paced, modern, inspiring video:

Now if you're ready, please draw one of the following characters and submit it to me. I will judge your work and if I choose your drawing* as the winning entry, I will mail you a fabulous prize! First, the rules:

1. You are not limited to hand drawn-sketches (although I have received one that is quite enthralling from Tits McGee). You may represent the subjects in any media, including sculpture, still-life, photography, written piece (haiku, short story, recipe), live reenactment with living animals, MS Paint, video, collage, yarn art, knitting, hokked rug, etc. No mimeographing!

2. You must email me your entry by midnight (EST) on January 31. That's 2 short weeks in which you could change your life!

3. You may submit as many entries as you like.

Good luck! Now sharpen your pencils!

Here are your lucky subjects (choose just one ... or draw all three in a ménage à trois ... whatever tickles your pickle!):

* notice I did not say If I decide your drawing most closely resembles the original in any way.

If you liked this, you may be interested in past contest-related posts.