August 02, 2006

Ice Cream Kinda Day [*Now UPDATED!]

It's 100 degrees outside, which means only one thing: Time for ice cream. Which of our agreed-upon flavors should I try?

The Ice Cream Flavors:

Asparagus
Asphalt
Astroglide
Ass
[Asshat]
Astroglide
Autumn Leaves
Bactine
Bangers-n-Mash
Beef Barley
Beet
Blood
Borgnine
Bum Fluff
Burnt Chicken Skin
Canker
Cellulite
Choad
Cigar
Clam Chowder
Clams Casino
Cod Liver Oil
Crunchy Frog
Curds-n-Whey
Defeat
Dentures
Dirty Girl
Dirty Sanchez
Dust Bunny
Edamame
Eggs Over Easy
Fish & Chips
Flannel
Fred Flintstone's feet
Fried Green Tomatoes
Fungoid Tincture
Gauze
Goat Teat
Grout
Guilt
Guinness (actually, that exists)
Haggis
Hamster
Hatred
Hobo
Kitty Litter
Klean Prep
Kosher Dill
Kudzu
Melanoma Mudpie
Metal
Mint Pussy
Moonshine
Moth
Mothball
Motherf***ing Chocolate Milk!
My Plums
Non-Acetone Nail Polish Remover
Nose Crispitos
Noxzema
Nuts and Bolts
Nutty Chunks o' Nail
Orange Ya Glad I Didn't Say Banana
Pickles
Pimento
Pimple
Pipe Tobacco
Plaque
Pony
Preparation H
Psoriasis
[Rich Corinthian Leather]
Scabies-n-Rabies
Scunge
Scurvy
Self-Loathing
Shalimar
Shame
Sheep Teat
Shepherds Pie
Shoe Insert Surprise
Soapy Suds
Sperm Ice
Spiderweb
Spinach
Swamp Ass
Taco Salad
Toejammygoodness
Toner
Tongue Depressor
Toothpaste
Tube Steak
Unflossed
[Vomint]
WD-40
Wet Hairball
White School Paste
Whore
Wolverine

38 comments:

DaMasta said...

'DaMasta' flavour is a swirl of bubble-gum-mixed-with-sour-apple-topped-with-whip-cream-and-strawberries goodness! It will make your mouth tingle.


word veri = ekzwl = Snoop Dog says, "Ez kewl!"

DaMasta said...

Ooo, tacosalad! oOo, tacosalad! oOO, tacosalad!

OMG, I almost saw my breakfast in reverse when I read "pimple" flavored. Blerp.

Bill said...

I would recommend:

- Cellulite Surprise
- Ooze 'n Goo
- Cankers 'n Crust
- Old Sock Swirl

Brookelina said...

I can't believe there isn't a smegma. Or a booger. Or what about balls?

FRITZ said...

Ohmigosh...I can't believe I didn't think of these two before:
"Detroit Gutter Ball"
and
"Flooded New Orleans"

Izzie said...

Stale sweat.
Old hamster sawdust.
Curry fart.
Cheap "flavoured" lube.

Madge said...

Mmmm, the ice cream shoppe. I have never suggested anything before, but,
in the spirit of Brooke's suggestion of smegma, I would be happy to give you my recipe for choad splash.

miss kendra said...

kitty litter

Übermilf said...

I saw "Haggis" but read "Huggies."

I'm not sure which is worse.

BeckEye said...

What about Fromunda Cheese? You know....cheese fromunda ya balls. (Well, not yours or mine...it's funnier when a guy says that.)

mr_g said...

How 'bout:

Pussy Discharge
Mixed Bodily Fluid Sorbet
Rim-Job Rocca

mr_g said...

And that was PUS-y, as in full of pus, not pussy...I hope nobody got confused...

Weary Hag said...

What a wonderful shop you will have. Can barely wait to stop in.

I'm afraid my thinking cap fell off about three months ago so all I can come up with are:

Crusty Booger
and
Orange Ya Glad I Didn't Say Banana

bricotrout said...

hmmm, i missed this. how about Trout Testicle Surprise?
thems good lickens!

Zombie Lou said...

Lou Reed is afraid of ice cream.

Juliabohemian said...

How about dandruff, toner and cat litter?

I thought of you today. I went to a boutique that had bears....dressed as angels, ballerinas, soccer players...you name it. I imagined you coming in with a shotgun and blowing everyone to smithereens and then offing yourself. The cops would be left puzzled forever.

jiggs said...

I feel like I commented on this in a previous life.

Anna said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anna said...

Dirty Sanchez Swirl.

I had originally named this different;y. But I am MUUUCH happier with THIS flavor. It just works.

Gyrobo said...

I'm not supposed to reveal confidential product information, but Roboshrub Inc. is working on a magma flavored ice cream. Keep it under your hat.

MadMeer said...

How about rippling sweaty man muscles flavored? Or Cunnilingus Night Cap? Hmmm? Hmmmmm! I'll take 2 scoops, please.

LBseahag said...

was I drunk-blogging in the comments part of the suggestions? I am slurring my type..and telling you I miss you....hahahhahahahha


my favorite is whore, too...
i bet it smells like the perfume Shalimar...

miss kendra said...

whores don't use shalimar.

like strippers, they use victoria's secret strawberries and champagne.

UberGoober said...

It may be to late but I was wondering why ther was no Humus Ice Cream on the list.

BeckEye said...

What about good old "vomit"?

amera hearts said...

I'm going to go with Muther f-ing chocolate milk just because those other flavors scared me!

Tits McGee said...

Mint Pussy. So refreshing!

Kat said...

What about Fredo's favourite flavour...teabaggin'. You never know, it may be like a neopolitan of sorts.

yournamehere said...

How about Mel Gibson's favorite flavor, Hitleripple.

Brookelina said...

I vote for asshat. If it's not a flavor, then it should be!

jiggs said...

what about sexual chocolate?

Madge said...

You should get your squeaks out and have a scoop of WD-40. That shit smells so good.

*I thought of another flavor for you to consider when you're making menu updates: Vomint.

Tumbleweed said...

I say Whore! Very satisfying, less filling and you don't get tired of it!

Anonymous said...

i would say astroglide and pickles...

jamwall said...

why does it keep defaulting me to anonymous?

grrrrr.

i was gonna say, astroglide and pickles..

Zen Wizard said...

I think, "White Chocolate Fondue" would be a good name for a flavor, as well as "Flan."

Flan would be custard with raisin bits.

Those are both bullshit, but sound really good, which is what an agribusiness food conglomerate wants.

How about "Mexican Fried Ice Cream" as a "flavor"?

You would have little bits of the fried part in the ice cream.

Or, "Sopapilla"?

That would have honey, chocolate, and whipped cream and powdered sugar hints in the vanilla ice cream, with little bits of the sopapilla dough.

I think I would be a good flavor inventor...

Ricardo Montalbán said...

Rich Corinthian Leather.

Jeans Pants said...

Disgusting and hilarious