July 17, 2006

The Alphabet Meme

I borrowed this idea from my secret lovah, but I also changed it rather drastically because some of the terms restricted me too much. Like my breasts, my ideas need to be free to bounce. Maybe this meme will spread across the internets and I will be famous!!!

I doubt.

But here it is, in all its glory!

Trying to live my best life, my most authentic and honest life.
Average: In most ways, except for intelligence and beauty, wittiness, talent, and charm. Otherwise, I'm in the 50th percentile.
Annoyance: People who walk around with their wireless headsets on. Especially if they are talking into them. Today, on my errands, I became one of those people. I hate myself.
Age: Physical -- 37. Mental -- I'll forever be 17.

Best Friends:
My sisters, San-San, and Elle. Fabulous girls who bring out the best in me.
Beer: Never again.
Birthday: 11.5
Boast: I can play the Bumblebee Tuna Song on the harmonica; I taught myself.

My favorite song by Dave Matthews. Also, Johnny Depp. Also, Jamwall and Jiggs, the bread in my SG-n-cheese sandwich.
Car: Noisy, necessary.
Candy: Not a fan. Cheesecake? Yes.
Cry: When I need to, usually into my pillow.

Spent out of doors remind me that I am alive.
Dream: Of swimming underwater, breathing. Of flying, low to the ground, after a running start. Then crashing into a shrub.
Dare: To cross Long Island Sound in a 6' rowboat; to jump from a 40' cliff into the Ligurian Sea. To travel for weeks at a time. To fly in a hot air balloon. To go on safari. To live in Australia. One of those I will never do, and all of them I will tell my mom about long after they happened.
Drug: Of choice --- cheddar. Drugs are bad! Listen to Nancy Reagan! Never was into powders, pills & plants smoked or otherwise imbibed. Alcohol? Ask me later and I'll tell you the story again.

To see the positive in almost any situation.
Eggs: every day, almost. Hard boiled, on toast. No, scrambled. Oooh, with cheese & tomato.
Email: constant.
Envy: A sprite with short blond hair and a boyish body. Why is that?

fresh herbs, good balsamic vinegar, sea salt.
Favorites: at the moment ... toast with jam and James Blunt. My kayak. My black sandals. Spray tan.
Flaws: Temper, venom, pride.
Finicky: about seeds. No caraway, please. Flax? Too slippery. Poppy? Maybe. Sesame!

To be fully & wholly alive.
Gifts: Music, humor, the written word.
Gum: Orbit. Trident. Altoid peppermint.
Gross: The squished mouse on the road, the drowned earthworm on the asphalt. Bear smell. Dog shit.

I should shave it off to curb my own vanity. As if I could. It is a glorious mane.
Height: I see all your house-dust, above the places where you could reach. Also your dandruff and down your neckline to your nipples, even meaning not to.
Happiest: Near water.
Hate: Do I hate anything? Caraway seeds, but we covered that. I hate being lied to and being ignored.

Ice Cream:
Ben & Jerry's Mint Oreo, or whatever you are serving at the moment. Except bubblegum. Ew.
Piano. Guitar. Voice. Mind.
Idols: Barbara Kingsolver. Carl Sagan. Stephen King.
Independence: Does not come easily. Value the work that went into it.

Silver mostly. Almost never a watch. Dragonfly necklace.
Jail: A great place to meet guys. A fun place to learn how to take what you're dealt. In my opinion, you've made some really big mistakes if you end up incarcerated. Easy for me to judge, living on this side of the law & my good luck.
Jenga: I really hate this game.
Jammies: 24-7. Unless I need to go out.

Are really cute until they are about 9.
Karaoke: Is for drunk people & people who can actually sing.
Kicks: Soccer, rugby, climbing, swimming
Kiss: Would be nice.

Longest ...:
Night of my life --- lost in the woods in Ontario, sleeping on a granite rock, in the pouring rain.
Love: What else is there?
Life: Just this one time around. Don't f*** it up.
Lost: Something important that I thought was dispensable, at the time.

Icy cold, with hot fresh brownies. 2%.
Miss: Noun: My title at work ("Miss G"); verb: a daily emotion. Miss my cat, my childhood, my old house, my grandfather, my old boyfriend, my old room, a certain tree, the way the sky looked that one day.
Movies: Not as fun as they used to be because most people are assholes.
Memory: The fox that ran across the road and pounced high into the air then straight down, both paws on a mouse.

Short as I can stand them
No: To skydiving. I don't care if I should do it once. I will never do it. What? I'm a wuss? Fine. A wuss who loves & respects the inevitability of gravity. See how I lie on my belly and kiss the ground. Ooooh, sweet gravity. Come here & lay a big dirt smooch on me.
Name: Muthana
Never: To hang-gliding either. See above.

My expectations regarding most things.
One: The number of times I will let you hurt my feelings.
Office: The best show on TV.
Only: A word that helps me to expect less and to be patient.

Pet Peeves:
Huge gums. Snapping gum. Cracking knuckles. Tailgaters.
Primal urge: to break something so utterly that it can never be repaired.
Personality: so much more important than anything else.
Pain: An everyday reality.

to laugh, to judge, to respond, to change my mind, to smile, to think of an alternative
Quirk: I suck rocks for the salty taste.
Qualms: About staying put. About changing.
Quest: To leave a thumbprint on your life.

Reason to ...:
forgive. That we're all just doing the best we can.
Reality TV: The bane of intelligence, and my secret pleasure. Yes, I watched every single episode of Temptation Island.
Rage: A blinding red streak that I have not seen in a very long time.
Regret: Why does this one always come up? Just one, I said.

My body sings my soul.
Season: Autumn's first crisp chill.
Shoes: Bare toes, painted watermelon.
Silly: The child in us.

Don't bring work home so that your time at home is your own.
Ticklish: Trained myself not to be ticklish on the bottoms of my feet because I used to lie on my stomach and read with my feet in the air; my dad would tickle them when he went by, and I liked that he did that. I didn't want to flinch.
Taste: Very Pottery Barn, very Pier 1. Also, I love toile, but don't have any in my house.
Torment: Sleeplessness. Looking at the clock, knowing I have to work in 4 .. 3 ... 2 hours.

The minute I get home from work, and put on my PJ pants and tank top.
Unpredictable: Most things strike me as funny, and I laugh at the wrong time.
Unfortunate: I got the job and you didn't. Doesn't mean you have to be mad at me.
Unforgettable: It started to drizzle as we walked through the rhododendrons, and you reached back through the leaves for my hand.

Anything but okra.
Virgin: Olive Oil
Voice: Alto

Worst Habit:
Sleeping too long; soaking dishes instead of just washing them already
Wish: World peace, of course. Are we almost there?
Waste: I don't like to throw things out, so I give them away.
Wander: Paralyzing fear of getting lost as I drive in the car. To desensitize myself I drive and get lost on purpose, then find my way out. I don't think it has helped much.

Porn is gross.
X-Rays: It freaks me out that you can see people's bones, and a nail in their head.
X-Men: Still waiting for the first one to get here from Blockbuster.com so that I can watch 2 and 3 and see what all the hype is about.
X-marks the spot: I hide dollars from myself in the pockets of my winter clothes, to find later.

Year born:
Yes: to cheese.
Yellow: and orange, two colors I don't wear.
Yearn: secret words whispered into my hair at sunset

Zoo Animal:
Zodiac: Scorpio. Ain't it obvious?!?
Zealous: about Mozart. If you love him too, then you understand.
Zzzz: My bed is the best place in the world.


Lightning Bug's Butt said...

Don't fear X-rays. They're your friends.

Bill said...

Holy moly! That's 104 questions to fill out! Is this a government meme?

I may try it, but if I do I'll have to take a machete to it.

Brookelina said...

I love this!!!

Again, we have so much in common I'm wondering if we were in a past life together. Huge gums!!! Ewwwwwwww!!!!!

jamwall said...

if i memorize this, will you spank me?

miss kendra said...

i heart you.

Lee Ann said...

I am the same way with things that strike me funny and laughing at the wrong time.

Madge said...

thumbprint on madge: check!

this is a total read-againer for good reading pleasure. i'm gonna do it again tomorrow morning with my coffee.

i'm so excited!

Rrramone said...

So many things to comment on! :-)

jiggs said...

Yes to cheese! and to being the bread in the SG sandwich. Though I would prefer an open face sandwich as jamwall would be distracting with all his hilarity and his unnecessary extra penis.

jamwall said...

so far, you want to spread me onto a slice of bread with either jiggs casey or james blount.

DaMasta said...

..................i love you.

Freiya said...

i dislike okra too! it's all slimy when it's cooked, unless of course i'm doing it wrong, which is possible.
I shall be hiding money in my winter clothes pockets too ( but not dollars, because i'm not in America, no, if i hid dollars in my coat pocket it would be just twisted as i'd get all excited about a surprise cash bonus only to find i couldn't use it as it wouldn't have the Queens head on it )