July 22, 2015

The Barnyard Blues

A fellow blogger and I had a heated debate (heated, I tell you! Boy was it ever!) about barnyard animal sounds. This stemmed from a discussion about how onomatopoeia (quack quack, meow meow, woof woof) is different in different languages (in Estonian, the same 3 sounds are prääks prääks, näu näu, and auh auh). This conversation segued into a debate about people's thoughts about barnyard life. The discussion went something like this:

SG: I think the general population, when thinking of a barnyard sound, thinks cock-a-doodle-doo (or kikki-ri-ki-kii, in my case).

Sexy Other Blogger: Ya think so? Why, because of the cock part?

SG: No, because of the rooster on top of the barn.

SOB: Hmmm, I don't think so; I think it's probably moo.
SG: No way, man.

SOB: Oh, I think so.

SG: Care to make it interesting?

SOB: You're on, baby. By the way ... what are you wearing?

So a wager was made. Luckily, I have daily access to about 85 members of the general population*; I would have them answer this random question for me. I just so happened to be giving a quiz on Newton's Laws of Motion the next day (you don't know them, do you?**), so it was the perfect opportunity to show SOB just how right I was.


Behehehehe!!!: 1 vote.
And good job on the quiz, Christian!
(A next-day inquiry confirmed "behehehehe" as a goat sound)

Neigh?: 3 votes

Quack/Cluck: 1 vote

(I believe this type of cross-species union is genetically impossible)

Snort: 2 votes

grrrrrrrr: 1 vote

(Pam lives on a bear farm, so these results are skewed)

The startled bicalllck!

a hen makes when the egg leaves her cloaca:
1 vote

A dying zebra: 1 vote

(I believe this outlier should be eliminated,
as Andrew was picking his nose at the time and didn't really hear the question)

was up: 1 vote

(I guess the barnyard is in New Haven)

bawk bawk: 2 votes

hee-haw: 1 vote

eeeoinkkkkkkkkkkkk: 1 vote

quack: 4 votes

onk: 1 vote


cluck cluck: 4 votes

baa: 5 votes

one for

mooooo: 40 votes

Cock-a-doodle-doo: 1 vote!

Discussion and Conclusions:

Moo by a landslide. However, Gabriella is the nicest girl EVER so her cock-a-doodle-doo counts as 50 votes, so I still win. Christian has an A- in science. Andrew picks his nose. Most of the kids in suburban Connecticut have only seen farms in books or on TV; farm life is as foreign to them as life in Africa. However, if you tally up all the results, what we have is a typical storybook farm: a buttload of cows (one of whom wears a bell), a donkey, a few sheep and horses, some pigs, one dying zebra, one gangsta-rapper, a few chickens, and atop it all, proudly crowing to welcome the dawning morn, one bantam rooster.

* No minors were harmed in this process.

** Newton's Law Refresher Course
NL1: Law of Inertia. An object in motion will remain in motion at a constant speed, in a straight line, unless a force acts upon it. Ditto an object at rest.
NL2: An object accelerates in the direction of the force that acts upon it. This acceleration is inversely proportional to the object's mass. Also F= ma.
NL3: Every action force has a reaction force that is equal and opposite.


Getting There said...

Nice barnyard conversation. Its interesting how in different language animals sound different. A German goose, for example, goes, "Schnatter schnatter schnatter!" And is there a sound in English for what an elephant does? The German elephant goes, "Törööö!"

jamwall said...


and i never even ran for anything..

Bobby said...

Sorry to disappoint, but unless I was trying to work the word cock into the conversation, I would usually have said moo as well.

But good stuff.

Madge said...

Though I like to think of myself as more of the quack/cluck type, props goes to this dead-on startled hen sound:


Could anything be more accurate? That student is a genius. Or a pain in the ass.

mr_g said...

Gotta be the Mooo! But then Ilive in California...Happy Cows come from California.

LBseahag said...

I vote for Happy Cows too...

but I like things that rhyme with Cluck...


Juliabohemian said...

whenever we sing old Mac Donald had a farm...my 2 year old always says he had a cow, no matter what, even if we've already done the cow.

Sleep Goblin said...

Comment #2:
You should abuse your teaching privileges for our amusement more often. That was hilarious!

Booty J Patrol said...

SG, what was the exact quesiton you asked the children? I would like to attempt to replicate your results on my own sample set of 90 children.

Spinning Girl said...

I asked them to visualize a barnyard & wriet the first animal sound they think of. Not the animal name, but the sound it makes.

BadGod said...

Newton. I fucked him. Oh!

I am commenting as Andrew Dice Clay. I am almost positive he would've said that.

Tim said...

this is awesome.

Jenna Catlin said...

Its was a great account. I am surprised how endearing it is.
compare Luton parking
meet and greet Luton

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