February 03, 2008

Art Contest Extravaganza!

While all of you are getting ready to watch the Superbowl, I am agonizing over the most difficult decision of my life. I speak, of course, of my art contest and the volume of fine artwork that I received in response to my challenge. First of all, thank you and congratulations to all who entered. You are all winners!!! I did disqualify one entry that came in from Think Frustrated. Upon viewing your entries, it seemed to me that your drawings had nothing to do with my contest at all, and you were just trying to get us all to come look at your stick figures. Nice try. They were cute though. Had you even drawn a turtle shell on one of your drawings, you would have been totally in.

As I studied the entries, I found myself in a true dilemma. Each of them is appealing in its own way, disturbing different aspects of my psyche at turns.

Take a look:

"Sheer beauty and absolute terror at the same time."

I find this entry to be the most disturbed, and disturbing, of the four I received. There's sure a lot going on here. To me, it represent the soullessness of modern man and the quest for greatness in a milieu of mediocrity. Or else that Jamwall has been eating mind-altering mushrooms.

Pope Terry
"here's my entry, it's enititled skippy the weredeer.
If this isn't spinning girl then apologies and disregard this message."

By far the best part of Pope Terry's entry is the fact that it is drawn on what appears to be the back of some sort of work-related booklet, like maybe he was sitting in a meeting drawing this. Well, that and the giant brain.


"If I don't win this there is no God."

Butchie's entry fills me with a confusing mixture of desire and loathing. I can't stop staring at that tiny little pierced penis. I want to touch it, and then tear the paper into tiny pieces.

(make usre you click-through for maximum enjoyment)

"Drawing this cheered me up more than I can say."

Tits has been campaigning the hardest for a win, as seen in her comments. Hers was also the first entry to come in, which tells me that she really embraced the contest with her full bosom. I also like the sort of passive smirk on the Bambi, and the sideline encouragement of the turtle.

Now I find myself faced with the monumental task of choosing a winner, and I cannot do it alone. I guess this is why I never got a job at the Art Institute of America. It is simply too difficult!! Please weigh in on the following poll and I will consider your input when I make my final decision. I have also decided to send a prize to both the winner and the runner-up. I don't know what it will be, but you are guaranteed that it is crap from my house (the best kind of prize, as history has taught us).
Now then:


Tits McGee said...

I voted for myself, of course, but Jamwall's use of "SOY BOMB" and the fact that Butchie's pirate sports a tattoo that looks very much like one of mine both gave me pause.

I think we should all just make out.


jamwall said...

Yay! Mine's the most disturbing!

jamwall said...

Pardon me while I "study" Tit's drawing in...um...privacy....

Kat said...

tits owes me an ass kicking.

miss kendra said...

those are amazing.

Alex L said...

I would dearly love to vote for myself, but that pirate just makes me so pleased to be alive.

For the next contest I shall try to be more like the other entires... filthy dirty.

(Formerly Pope Terry)

B.E. Earl said...

They were all wonderful, but since "there can be only one"...I voted for Butchie.

That pirate really creeped me out.

Freewheel said...

Disturbing and yet fun!

jiggs said...

I think tits will win in a tits-slide... super tuesday indeed!

Scarlet Hip said...

I am so glad I didn't enter. I'd have been humiliated to be in the same contest with all of this greatness.

Think Frustrated said...

That's sad. I really wanted to win. Boo for being disqualified. I think you got my intentions all wrong. No one reads my blog now, and I kind of like it like that. You needed some digital medium in your contest...