November 21, 2007

A LiveBlogging Experience:

Kids entering the classroom on the first school day after my classroom roommate got fired.

Where is Ms. Miller?
(awkward silence)
Ummm, she is out today, she had a family thing.

Woah, Ms. Miller's desk is all cleared off.
Yeah, umm, we are doing like a desk-switch fall cleaning thing. Boy, am I getting dusty. Does anyone else hate dust as much as I do? (deflect deflect deflect)

Do we have a sub?
Yes, it's Mr. Zapliski.

OK, he's cool. Where's Ms. Miller?

Hey Ms. G, is Ms. Miller out today?
Yup, she had a family thing. Get your notebooks out everyone! (cheerful smile)

Where's Ms. Miller?

She's out today. She had a family thing. (how many times do I say this before it starts to sound fake?)

Are you our sub?

Nope, it's Mr. Zapliski. I'm just starting the class until he gets here.

Woah, this rooms looks empty!

Yup, we're doing some cleaning.

Is there a sub for Ms. Miller?

Yup, it's Mr. Zapliski.

Where's Ms. Miller?
(She got her ass fired, OK? She wasn't any good, and she was incompetent, and you should be fucking grateful! Jesus Christ!!! Now take out your notebooks and watch fucking Mythbusters, OK?!?!?!?!?)
She's out today.

Repeat above cycle 25 times.


Lightning Bug's Butt said...

I feel so comfortable with you having access to our country's young, impressionable minds.

Scarlet Hip said...


Uh....where's Ms. Miller?

jamwall said...

Just admit that you killed her.

J said...

Wow, what do you tell kids whose teacher's been fired?

Pope Terry said...

I'm glad you said fuck to the kids, it gets them ready for the real world

jiggs said...

Ms Miller was doing it with a student... am I right?

Think Frustrated said...

They get to watch Mythbusters? What a cool teacher.