July 20, 2005

Stupid x 3

Top 3 Stupidest Things I Have Done:
A Give & Take Sharing Session

1979: My sister & I decided to ride bikes side by side, with me holding her handlebars and her holding mine. The ride lasted 0.13 seconds and we traveled approximately 9.75 inches before falling over. She jumped off, I fell -- on her bike -- and the axle poked a 1” deep hole in my thigh.
High point: The exhilaration of considering a future circus career.
Low point: The realization that this dream, too, must die.

1988: Traveling halfway across Long Island Sound in a 12’ rowboat. We took 3 outboard motors that my boyfriend had rebuilt & wanted to try out. No life vests. Only other boats out there were the ferry and a huge barge.
High Point: Swimming off the middlegrounds lighthouse.
Low point: What I did for Love.

2000: Jumping off a cliff near the
Via dell’ Amore in Manarola, Italy and breaking my tailbone. A 35’ jump and I didn’t clench properly. Water shot up my butt and snapped my tailbone. It hurt for a year.
High point: The view on the way down was gorgeous.
Low point: The instant I hit the water and made that elephant-seal-like groan that you only make when you majorly hurt your ass (you’ve made it too, when you fell off your bike seat onto the bar) .

14 comments:

Ron said...

Please tell me that pic of the old lady with the dildo-like-object going into her mouth did not come from the Hartford Courant. If so, I must have it.

Ron said...

Also, I'd like to add a flavor to your ice cream list: Baby Seal Eyelash

Dead Fox said...

The rest of your posts are wonderful and humourous, but this one is downright inspiring.

Spinning Girl said...

R--nope, not the Courant. It's the Spectrum (2003). F--Thanks for the props; I hope I've inspired others who have been hurt in stupid ways to step forward and release their shame to the universe.

sharon said...

Living in CT myself makes me realize that doing stupid things is from drinking the water. So far the stupidest thing is this - Moving to Louisana, coming back to CT on vacay, and never leaving...wonder if that means I'm still on vacation.....

midwest_hick said...

lol....great post......kudo's

BadGod said...

1975: I was born.
High point: nurse was kinda hot, mom was kinda happy.
Low point: 29 years later I am single, typing on a computer at 3:43 am and listening to Elvis.

yes I rock.

afp763389 said...

:)

Steve said...

i earned an 11 stitch wound on my leg when i transported a hand saw on my bike's handle bars, which got caught in the spokes, which caused me to flip, which cut my leg open.

If my neck were anywhere near that saw during the spill, I would be dead. Hurray!

The Everglades said...

Wow, the same thing happened to my girlfriend when she jumped off a cliff in Italy in the summer of 2001. And her tailbone hurt for a year as well. I felt so bad for her!

Blake

Spinning Girl said...

The only way to realign a tailbone is by a "probing anal readjustment". No thanks!

JJ said...

Oh, Spinner, in row boat? Really? That must have been a LOT of love.

They would have to tie my hands and feet and throw me off a cliff to get me to jump at that height. You are far braver than I.

Monkey said...

So... what you're saying is... you were sodomized by a lake? Yes, that would be extraordinarily painful indeed.

Lee Ann said...

Damn! I was sitting there thinking how jealous I was of you being in Italy! Then all of the sudden, you had me laughing about the remark "Water shot up my butt". Sorry, I know that must have hurt like hell, but the way you put it, gave me an instant uncontrollable chuckle. Then I cringed right after the chuckle. The bike thing must have been quite painful too.

crybxvlq - see even my word verification was crying over something too!